Topic: Classic issue : STAR protection

[Denis]

Yes, I know, permanently fit a loaded UZI behind the grille and when the star leaves the radiator shell : voilà !!!!

OK, seriously, I am going to fit an alarm.

Now time for a tiny french lesson  guys 

You know, the kind of alarm that honks at the "son of a whore" (french slang : fils de pute) that tries to pull it.

I am quite unfamiliar with alarms. Do I need a microswitch ? or is there some kind of "touch sensitive" device ? I understand that vibration detection is a contactor that closes when there is some lateral motion but that does not sound like an early warning since it seems that quiet a bit of motion is needed.

If the alarm could "beep" at the fils de pute, he might leave it at that.

My Portuguese neighbour seriously thinks that a load of salt in the ass from a 20 gauge is the best solution but french law prohibits that - we are not in the hills of Portugal, unfortunately 

I am actually trying to do two things : warn the "sons of a whore" while provoking the least inconvenience to my neighbours, so no full blown circus at first...

Suggestions other than rehabilitating the guillotine ?

Denis

Paris, France

[OzBenzHead]

Denis: Perhaps you need a variant on my Old Man's method (very successful!) for deterring farm dogs from p1ssing on his wheels: a spare ignition coil so rigged that anyone touching (or p1ssing on) the car gets 20,000 volts up his arm (or whatever). Should give les fils des putes (?) pause for thought - without actually damaging them (too much).   

PS: Have a thought for the neighbourhood poodles, though. 

[Andreas]

Oz that sounds like a great idea. zzz zzz

[Denis]

Hi OZ

Great idea BUT how do you do it ? The STAR needs to be insulated from the radiator shell, any suggestiosn 

Denis

Paris, France


Superb weather, it's time to visit folks !

[Des]

Gordon; was it you some months back that posted a video clip on how to do this?

might have been here or on ozvets, wiring the star into a coil linked to the battery I think?

[OzBenzHead]

Great idea BUT how do you do it ? The STAR needs to be insulated from the radiator shell, any suggestiosn 

Denis: I'd have to ask the old man, but he's been dead 46 years! (Seance, anyone?)  I was too young to understand anything except that if I were to do like a dog - pee on the car - I'd get lotza voltza up my woltza! I seem to recall that it was probably okay to touch the car if it and I were dry, but not if both were wet. There was a switch (rubber-covered to keep it waterproof) on the mudguard (fender) just forward of the driver's ("suicide"-style) door. I doubt that any metal part of the car was insulated from this extra (potential) current, as the old man himself rigged it, and he was no particular electrical genius - just a humble, largely unmechanised dairy farmer. The car was a late '40s Hillman. I imagine that if a car has any electronics in it (e.g. electronic ignition, D-Jet, etc.) there could be insulation issues, otherwise there'd be no need to isolate the star from the grille (would there?).

Des:

Gordon; was it you some months back that posted a video clip on how to do this?
might have been here or on ozvets, wiring the star into a coil linked to the battery I think?

Hmmm ... Sounds familiar, but it was not I. I thought it might have been HansKruger and, having searched the Ozvets site, I found it: http://www.w123-world.org/showthread.php?t=301. Unfortunately, this now comes up as a "404 not found". Perhaps the 123 site has an archive of it.

I also retrieved this:
http://cgi.ebay.com.au/Mercedes-star-removable-magnetic_W0QQitemZ4631907637QQcategoryZ72454QQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem which, whilst not appearing to be for a 116, might nonetheless be available (or a 123 version might fit).

[BC]

Dear Denis,
The guillotine is highly recommended. Wasn't it developed as a thoroughly modern device said to be at the cutting edge (sic) of technology at the time?
I know the English claim to have developed a guillotine type device about 1307 but surley your good Dr Joseph-Ignace Guillotin made it the splendid device it is today? A miniature device mounted on the bonnet would certainly deter thieves although you may have to fend off the Mediaeval Arms Society when they try to souvenir it.
I shall be in Paris on the 29th of June so we could discuss this over a glass of Bourdeaux?
Alternatively you could try the method used by the original owner of my 450SE. When he purchased the car in 1979 he had a micro switch fitted, by the Sydney Benz dealer, at the base of the emblem. It is activated by any movement to the emblem which swings an extension arm against the switch and sets off a pair of Italian air horns mounted near the airconditioning condensor. It works. Grown men flee and dogs refuse to go near it (I know, I have 7 of them who will piss on the whells but never on the emblem - although that could be because they can't reach it....)
Regards,
Brian Crump

[Denis]

Hi Brian

While I favour the guillotine for nasty fingers idea, the microswitch idea is the simplest and most effective.

I will be out of town when you arrive but please call me at the office on July 3rd at 01.64.86.83.68 and we will certainly do a little "picolage" together.

Denis

Paris, France

[BC]

Denis,
Who owns the lovely silver green 116 I have sometimes seen dropping off passengers at Notre Dame?
Regards,
Brian

[Denis]

Hi Brian and all

Dropping people off at Notre Dame ? I bet that is either for the hospital or the police 

It is certainly possible to drop off people there but forget parking these 5 metre cars 

Denis

Paris, France